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Just a vent

SO this post has nothing related to secondlife or virtual world things. I just wanted to vent somewhere RL isn’t involved. I’m not looking for responses, pats on the back, negativity, other stories. I literally am just venting and I am so awkward with socializing online I can 100% let you know I wont respond to any comments. Not in a mean rude way but in a…idk how to even slightly be social with online people way! Just a little disclaimer if you comment or something and get no response from me, that is why.

OK onto the venting!

 

SO…sighs

I was at work today, we were doing some volunteering with some kids for music and I noticed this boy tugging, flicking, blowing this girls hair sitting next to him. I watched for a bit as she asked him nicely to please stop, then was more firm and said stop, you’re bothering me and then he tugged her hair and she said stop, that hurts, why are you still bothering me. That’ when I stepped in and said to him…please leave her alone as she has asked you to stop multiple times politely and firmly. He laughed at me as his mother who was there walked up and said to me and the entirety of the class that I am being dramatic and “Boys will be boys”. I literally almost vomited in my own mouth from her disgusting words. I know she could see it on my face as she rolled her eyes at me.  I took a breath, gathered my thoughts as fast as I could and asked if I could talk to her in private. She very loudly said no if you have something to say to me say it here in front of everyone. Little did she know I was just being polite to try to save face for her but sure lady, I’ll say it here!

I don’t understand how you can say “boys will be boys” without realizing the disservice you are doing to your own child let alone the rest of the people your child will come in contact with for the rest of his life. I’m not here to tell you how to raise your child or the best way to do anything but I know with my son I want him to know consequences of his actions, both for himself and others. I taught him what consent means and how to respect every human and animal he comes in contact with regardless of social status, gender, race etc. It baffles me that in 2018 you can sit here and still think this is ok while you hold onto your younger female childs hand knowing someone could be saying the same thing to their child elsewhere in the world…”boys will be boys” and this person could potentially come in contact with your daughter and have that same mentality you’re teaching your son, that boundaries don’t matter, consent doesn’t matter, the other persons feelings don’t matter because …”boys will be boys”. I hope for the future of your daughter and all other daughters that I am “just being dramatic”.

She just gave me a dirty look and took her two kids and left. The room stayed silent for what seemed a long time lol but wasnt so I figured why stop there …. let me unleash some of my childhood trauma that still affects me today! lol I asked if it was ok to speak about some things and was given permission, shockingly, so I am going to continue my venting but not at anyone in particular like above.

When I was in elementary school, I had just moved to TN from Louisiana and so I “talked funny” to the kids there. I am adopted. I am Native American, Puerto Rican and Sicilian so I have olive skin which as a young child I had super deep skin tone, very tan compared to my caucasian parents. I was put into a very strict catholic school with all caucasian students and staff. Which was fine…to me. Almost immediately I was called the N-word. I was called little brown girl. Boys and girls shoved me around, called me horrible names, spit on me. One incident that still sits with me is one day at recess they finally were kind of being nice to me. They let me get on the merry go round with them! I was thrilled! Then one girl said eww get her off of here, her kind is dirty get her off of here now! I was embarrassed so I started to get off the merry go round then I feel someone grab my ankle and someone else push me from behind. I fell head first off the mary go round hitting my chin on the gravel below. I look behind me to see 2 boys holding my ankles laughing and then one yell GO GO GO! I scrambled to get my feet away or get my chin and face away from the gravel below me. I failed.  I felt the merry go round get faster and faster as my chin dragged violently across the gravel. This went on for at least 2 minutes before a nun came over and stopped it by grabbing me off the ride dragging me to the principles office scolding me. While the nurse picked gravel and dirt out of the hole in my chin, I was scolded for not being social enough. I was told they were just mean to me because they liked me. The boys liked me soooo much they hurt me emotionally and physically. The girls liked me sooo much the verbal assaults were from jealousy of how much they wanted to be my friend and they liked me. It was my fault for not realizing this.

Cut to 30 yrs later, 10 or 20 abusive relationships with men and random friends later…

It doesn’t go away. The trauma of things when you’re younger. Don’t.Go.Away. I am an adult now. I have an amazing man in my life who puts up with so much from me. I’m still so conflicted with things from that far back that it fully affects everyday life. I question all the time if this man really loves me because unlike my past relationships he doesn’t verbally abuse me, physically harm me or put me down to raise himself up. So he can’t truly love me right? My heart says he does but im programmed to think otherwise. Why!? Why am I like this. I am like this because someone said to me… ‘boys will be boys” Boys are mean to you and hit you because they like you, they have a crush on you. Girls are mean to you because they want to be your friend and they like you.

Dont hurt the future of your childs happiness because you don’t want to teach them decency. Dont let them think these things are ok. None of this is ok. I am scarred emotionally from this. Not just the large scar on my chin from that day on the merry go round. That trauma is still there because nobody told me that behaviour was not ok. So speak the fuck up. Dont raise a sociopath, abusers, rapists.

Vent over! I hope this isn’t taken negatively but I also don’t care if it is. I stand by what I say 100%. Dont do a disservice to your children. Be kind to each other. Sorry this isn’t a secondlife post but I just had to get this out today. Love you Peoples and will have lighter sl related stuff later tonight or tomorrow. Thank you for reading this. Have an amazing day and again… Be kind and mindful to each other! ❤

 

 

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Hideout

SAF-VRS-HF

Worn:

Safira – Violette @ Kinky

Kibitz – Chrystal necklace – silver

RAMA.SALON – Jess Hair ‘BLACKS’ @ Hair Fair

Pose:

L y r i u m – Bento Series Set 4

Skybox:

VARONIS – Hideout Skybox

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I’m chasing something even if it’s been done

JB-CM-BB-

CM

Worn:

*Just BECAUSE* Simone Top @ Uber

Blueberry – Frank Jeans & Boots

tram H0906 hair / HUD-A @ Hair Fair

Decor:

* CHEZ MOI  Riverdale Hay Set @ COSMOPOLITAN

  •  Riverdale Hay Couch
  • Riverdale Firepit

floorplan. string light pallets

hive // dark boho string lights

hive // hay hooks

Mikunch Retro bicycle

PILOT – Hay with Blanket

:CP: Asher’s Hayride Cider Station

[Merak] – Wheel Light

PLAAKA AutumnHay

dust bunny . harvest . haybale

Hayabusa Design Wind Field of Grass and Flowers

Hayabusa Design – Wheat Field

[we’re CLOSED] grass field dry

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Exile @ Hair Fair

Hair Fair is open! I have all of Exile releases here to show you. They are one hair but different styles as it comes with style hud. Love them all!! Make sure to join demo group and try them on! I also wanted to remind you that this event is a charity event for an amazing cause. Hair Fair does accept donations but are definitely not mandatory. Happy shopping ladies!! ❤

HF-EX-bb

1st

Exile – Intensity (style hud) @ Hair Fair 2018

toksik – Selva Top (Black)

Blueberry – Frank Jeans

2nd

Exile – Intensity (style hud) @ Hair Fair 2018

Emery Ohara Top Off White

Blueberry – Frank Jeans

3rd

Exile – Intensity (style hud) @ Hair Fair 2018

The Secret Store – Ella Crop Top – Dots

amias – MIRA 1

Blueberry – Frank Jeans

HF-EX-bb2

1st

Exile – Trouble (style hud) @ Hair Fair 2018

Blueberry – Frank Jeans

`M.BIRDIE / Merry look-glasses2

[monso] My Love Set – T-Shirt

[monso] My Love Set – Choker A2

2nd

Exile – Trouble (style hud) @ Hair Fair 2018

Blueberry – Frank Jeans

Tee*fy Aurelia Top – Black Floral

Kibitz – Kiaria necklace – silver @ N21

3rd

Exile – Trouble (style hud) @ Hair Fair 2018

Blueberry – Frank Jeans

`M.BIRDIE / Merry look-topB1

4th

Exile – Trouble (style hud) @ Hair Fair 2018

Blueberry – Frank Jeans

Kibitz – Kiaria necklace – silver @ N21

HF-EX-bb3

Exile – Mysterious (style hud) @ Hair Fair 2018

Blueberry – Frank Jeans

HF-EX-bb4

1st

Exile – A Little Sassy (style hud) @ Hair Fair 2018

Blueberry – Frank Jeans

Addams // Trisha Ripped Sweater

2nd

Exile – A Little Sassy (style hud) @ Hair Fair 2018

Blueberry – Frank Jeans

DAMI TEXT ME GACHA TOP *5

3rd

Exile – A Little Sassy (style hud) @ Hair Fair 2018

Blueberry – Frank Jeans

ISON – cropped turtleneck sweater

 

 

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Navy+Copper @ Hair Fair

HF-NC-mm

1st

Navy+Copper – Biscotti @ Hair Fair 2018 (opens tomorrow!!!)

Izzie’s – Baby Hairs V2 Hairbase (Catwa) @ Hair Fair 2018 (opens tomorrow!!!)

(Milk Motion)  – Cowry story @ The Arcade sept.2018

MIWAS / Puff sleeves off-shoulder top “Cloth” #Nude @ Collab88

Emery Domenica Suede Skirt Black @ Collab88

LOTUS. Diamond Tip Septum – Whitegold

2nd

Navy+Copper – Waffle @ Hair Fair 2018 (opens tomorrow!!!)

Tee*fy Winnie Slouchy Sweater @ Collab88

Tee*fy Aubree Ruffles Top @ Collab88

Tee*fy Aubree Ruffles Shorts @ Collab88

LOTUS. Diamond Tip Septum – Whitegold

 

 

 

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Hair Fair 2018 – Sims, Slurls and Styles

♥♥♥

Hair Fair Second Life

Hair Fair 2018 Map

Hair Fair will open from 0.01am SLT 22nd September and close 11.59pm SLT 7th October.

The list of Hair Stores participating in Hair Fair 2018 is below, as well as their releases exclusive to this event. The list is divided by Sim location. Slurls are included but direct teleporting is not available. To use the slurls once at the location of the event, copy slurl to chat then right click and show on Map. This will give you a beacon to navigate towards. We do hope that you visit all the booths at Hair Fair as every creator has done their best to provide their best for this event.

Donation amounts vary throughout the event, but all items do donate a minimum of 15% to Wigs for Kids. There are also Kiosks for direct donations, and Bandana Booths that donate 100% of all purchases.

There are no Fees to join…

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